How to turn constant disagreements into productive conversations.

Disagreements at work are normal, but when someone constantly challenges you, it can start to feel personal. It’s frustrating, especially when it slows progress or creates tension. None of us want to waste time or energy on conflict, so here are some practical ways to handle a disagreeable colleague while staying calm and effective.

Understand what’s really going on

Begin by checking your perspective. You may see yourself as positive and practical, but how might your colleague see you? They may not be difficult for the sake of it; perhaps they believe they’re balancing the conversation or offering a useful challenge.

Ask yourself: is the disagreement about the topic, or about how I present it? Some people naturally question everything, while others may be reacting to your confidence or style. Recognising this difference helps you respond more constructively.

Stay professional and calm

When you expect pushback, it’s tempting to get defensive. Resist it. Keep your tone neutral, avoid sarcasm, and stick to the facts. Don’t make it about being “right” … keep the focus on what’s best for the business. A calm approach shows leadership and prevents the conversation from derailing.

Ask clarifying questions

Often, people disagree because they don’t feel heard. Invite them to explain their thinking: “Can you walk me through your view?” or “What outcome are you aiming for?” These questions show respect, uncover common ground, and highlight where the real issue lies.

Choose the right time and place

If repeated disagreements are disrupting meetings, move the conversation elsewhere. A private chat is more productive than a public clash. Pick a time when neither of you is under pressure so you can talk openly. This shift alone can ease tension and strengthen your relationship.

Focus on shared goals

Bring the discussion back to what matters … your shared objectives. Whether it’s completing a project, improving service, or growing the business, remind them you’re both working toward the same outcome. Alignment reduces personal friction and encourages cooperation.

Use tools to understand behaviour

Clashes often stem from different working styles. Tools like the free PRISM Brain Mapping quiz can help you both understand your preferences in communication and decision-making. These insights can reduce misunderstandings and build empathy.

Set boundaries if needed

If the behaviour continues to damage morale, it may be time to set clear boundaries. Be firm but respectful about what’s acceptable. If nothing changes, escalate the issue; protecting your wellbeing and your team must come first.

Keep the focus on progress

Handled well, disagreements can lead to stronger outcomes. By staying calm, asking thoughtful questions, and keeping shared goals in sight, you can transform conflict into collaboration.